Thursday, July 16, 2009

Potential Expats have little knowledge of the country they aim to make their own for a little while

Potential Expats are clueless about India, read the following and understand why...the humorous way

The answers are the actual responses to the questions on the website posed by firangis who are planning a visit to India.

I personally liked the last one

Q: Does it ever get windy in India ? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? ( UK ).

A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

Q: Will I be able to see elephants in the street? ( USA )

A: Depends how much you've been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Delhi to Goa - can I follow the railroad tracks (Sweden)

A: Sure, it's only three thousand kms, take lots of water.

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in India ? (Sweden)

A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in India ? Can you send me a list of them in Delhi , Chennai, Calcutta and Bangalore ? ( UK )

A: What did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in India ? (USA)

A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe . In-di-a is that big triangle in the middle of the Pacific & Indian Ocean which does not.. oh forget it. ...... Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Goa . Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in India ? ( USA )

A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into India ? ( UK )

A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Indiana Pacers matches schedule? ( France )

A: Indiana is a state in the Unites States of...oh forget it. Sure, the Indiana Pacers matches are played every Tuesday night in Goa , straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

Q: Can I wear high heels in India ? ( UK )

A: You're a British politician, right?

Q: Are there supermarkets in Bangalore , and is milk available all year round? ( Germany )

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.

Q: Please send a list of all doctors in India who can dispense rattlesnake serum. ( USA )

A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from. All Indian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.

Q: Do you have perfume in India ? ( France )

A: No, WE don't stink.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in India ? ( USA )

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in India ? ( France )

A: Only at Christmas.

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )

A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first

Q: Can I see Taj Mahal anytime? ( Italy )

A: As long as you are not blind, you can see it anytime.

Q: Do you have Toilet paper? ( USA )

A: No, we use sand paper. (we have different grades)

37 comments:

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楊偉誠 said...

Better say nothing than nothing to the purpose. ........................................

WilburC_Custis said...

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MargorieZ said...

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原秋 said...

非常感謝~3Q~....................................................

AllenA_Ratcliff0于婷 said...

I love readding, and thanks for your artical.........................................

孟倫孟倫 said...

Make yourself necessary to someone...................................................

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建霖 said...

hello~nice artile..................................................

HaroldM22 said...

成功的第一要素是珍惜自己 ............................................................

07_TeddyF_Silvey0 said...

一個人的快樂,不是因為他擁有的多,而是他計較的少。..................................................

佩GailBohanan1蓉 said...

It is easier to get than to keep it.............................................................

jackveronic said...

婚姻對男人來說是賭他的自由,對女人而言卻是賭她的幸福。..................................................

WallaceD依來 said...

生存乃是不斷地在內心與靈魂交戰;寫作是坐著審判自己。......................................................................

江婷 said...

變天了~~注意身體,別感冒囉!.................................................................                           

于庭 said...

人生是故事的創造與遺忘。............................................................

MinBar林 said...

這麼好的部落格,以後看不到怎麼辦啊!!..................................................................

JasonBirk佳琪 said...

Prevention is better than cure.............................................................

佳伸佳伸 said...

第一次來這裡 愛上你的部落格 感謝你的分享............................................................

俊財俊財 said...

累了嗎?來杯咖啡休息一下吧!............................................................

楊儀卉 said...

如果你批評他人。你就沒有時間付出愛............................................................

香廷香廷 said...

知識可以傳授,智慧卻不行。每個人必須成為他自己。. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

林彥以林彥以 said...

出遊不拘名勝,有景就是好的..................................................................

黃錢靜怡慧婷 said...

這不過是滑一跤,並不是死掉而爬不起來了。..................................................

志張皓 said...

一棵樹除非在春天開了花,否則難望在秋天結果。............................................................

凱v胡倫 said...

值得一看再看的格子,請加油 ..................................................................

家唐銘 said...

快樂,是享受工作過程的結果............................................................

劉王育正劉王育正 said...

河水永遠是相同的,可是每一剎那又都是新的。..................................................

偉曹琬 said...

從人生中拿走友誼,猶如從生活中移走陽光......................................................................

守何何何韋 said...

好文不寂寞~支持!!!!@@a 搞錯了,這不是論壇推文 XDDD............................................................

佳張張張張燕張張張張張 said...

做些小善事,說些愛的字句,世界更快樂。..................................................

佳張張張張燕張張張張張 said...

Necessity is the mother of invention.......................................................................

黃英吳思潔吳思潔邦 said...

精彩的部落格 值得一推再推 支持你

骆雨康 said...

在你一無所有的時候 是誰在陪伴你 他便是你最重要的人......................................................................